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Monday
12/5/05
My
biggest bead fan is gone.
My mother passed
away 11/28/2005. Like all of our mothers, she was my
biggest bead fan, checking my auctions daily.
Nov 2003 she was
diagnosed with breast cancer, a double mastectomy
removed all traces of cancer, no fallow up treatment was required.
Feb 2004 found
colon cancer, an operation took 13" of colon and all
visible cancer, chemo and radiation followed but was stopped early when
it landed her in the hospital on an IV for 9 days with an obstructed
bowel.
Feb 2005 found
more colon cancer and it had spread to the ovaries and
nodes, an operation took more colon and all visible cancer, a
colostomy bag and chemo followed. They traveled (drove cross
country from Texas to North Dakota, you can imagine our disapproval) to
a family reunion this past summer where another operation inserted a
filter to prevent a blood clot from reaching her heart, painful twice a
day blood thinning shots were given for the next month. On their
way home she spent a couple of days in a hospital on an IV. She
was in the middle of radiation treatments at home when three weeks ago
another surgery was done for an obstructed bowel again. The
tumors were too small to show up on any scans but had spread to several
organs and even up into the Feb surgical incision.
Her time would be
short, they guessed a few months and mom wanted to
have a good last Christmas. My son I went to be with mom and dad
the day
after her surgery and my siblings made plans for Christmas. Every
day saw a new decline and when it was obvious that time was getting
short, my siblings moved their travel plans to come immediately. None
of them made it in time. Dad & I held her hands and
their pastor prayed as she slipped away. I miss my mother but the
details are not pleasant so I am grateful the final days were
short. Cancer can be a silent killer or it can roar through your
life with the force and pain of a hurricane.
To mom's credit
are 4 children, 10 grandchildren, 12
great-grandchildren (2 more on the way), 26 national bowling
tournaments, 34 state tournaments and an induction into the North
Dakota Bowlers Hall of Fame, 7 gallons of blood given to blood banks,
we found nearly 20 albums of vacation pictures (multiple vacations in
each album), and don't forget all those casino visits not on
film. She was a teacher, farm wife, they owned a grocery store
then a bulk gas station, she was also a bookkeeper at several other
businesses. I could go on forever on how active she was, it drove
dad crazy and he didn't try to stop her or even keep up, he just sat
back and loved who she was. She was quite a matriarch.
I am sad, angry,
remorseful, relieved, upset, etc. Mostly I am
confused and am not even going to try to sort it all out, time will do
that for me. It was a difficult 3 weeks that I wish no one
would ever have to go through, but that isn't realistic. We love
then we loose, we are happy then we morn. I tried to comfort my
mother by telling her it's all in the circle of life. I selfishly
took her last earthy smile as she slipped into a semi-coma state, awake
but not aware. As she took her final breaths, dad cried, the
pastor prayed and I told her she had our permission to go be with her
parents and brother.
Mom & I use
to talk 5-6 nights a week on MSN messenger over the internet, then she
would go check my auctions and go to bed. She has shortened that
process, now she can just whisper in my ear as she watches me make my
beads. The week before she passed she asked me to make her an
angel. Obviously I never got the chance so she will have to do
that whisper in the ear thing and guide me when I do.
To my biggest
bead fan - I miss you terribly.
Your loving
daughter, Donna
Four days after mom passed away,
dad's
sister Ruth also lost an 8 year battle with cancer.
Here is a
poem she had written about her impending reunion with the
Lord.
If
Tomorrow Starts Without Me.
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The folowing is a tribute auction to
mom that went up on eBay first part of May, 2006
It has a
rather interesting story behind the beads.
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Dena's Blue Jeans
I
am really excited about this set of beads and there is a story behind
their name. Dena is my mother and she passed away about 6 months
ago,
she was my biggest bead fan. I was trying something new the other
day
while thinking about mom and when these beads were done, they stopped
me cold in my tracks. My mother wore a lot of blue jean
cloths. Of all the beads I made her over
the years, she loved the blue jean style beads the best and I
believe this set would have been her favorite. Now for the
"aw" part of the story, the day I made them just happened to be her
birthday, guess she was guiding me, she would have been 80... I
made enough for two sets, something I don't normally do, so I had
enough to keep plus a set for auction. The beads have been
etched, just like mom would have
liked.
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